April 28, 2020

Hasten Grief and Loss Healing

We experience loss whenever there is an unexpected change in our relationships, circumstances, or health. Whether anticipated or unexpected, change or separation can elicit shock, disbelief and confusion. Grief from loss is cumulative and individuals can become overwhelmed when their “grief bucket” is overflowing. Contrary to what we have been lead to believe about grief, it does not go away with time, keeping busy or replacing the loss with a new relationship or pet.

An intellectual approach to healing, telling individuals, “they are in a better place”, “you’ll get over this”, “be strong, or strong for others” dismisses and dishonours what the person is feeling.

Talking about and rationalizing loss can trigger a myriad of conflicting, unresolved emotions that do not respond to a logical approach to working through fear and sorrow. Emotional incompleteness including regret, remorse, anger, guilt, resentment and blame, among others generally do not respond to talk therapy and can even be exacerbated by examining the circumstances surrounding the loss.

Emotional Freedom Techniques, (EFT tapping) is an evidence-based intervention that works to quickly reduce and release emotional intensity while tuning into specific distressing events and circumstances. EFT involves tapping on acupressure points which works quickly diminish distressing feelings and physical tension so that the individual can return to emotional balance and relaxation. Emotional harmony opens the way to remember positive experiences, heal the relationship with the deceased or departed person and begin to experience joy again.

Loss is often accompanied by trauma and cumulative losses heighten levels of anxiety, depression, fear and anger as the individual’s world seems to be spinning out of control. Attempts to deal with trauma and loss can lead to self-medication, isolating one’s self and shutting off from the support necessary to recover from the loss. Grief does not go away on its own and can linger for many months, years, even decades. EFT accelerates the release of unresolved emotions so that the individual can grief with grace and return to inner peace and to feeling connected and present to life again.